Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Leftovers - "The Tour"

It was fun a few weeks ago coming up with the best, most and worst of several things. Here's a couple more that occurred to me lately.
Best Sports Nickname - This one should go to basketball's Julius Erving - "Doctor J". The Doc was always articulate and soft-spoken. In his early ABA (those striped ball guys) days, he wasn't just "The Franchise", but the entire league! "Doctor" seemed to fit the kind of person he still is today in his 50's. By the way, "The Doctor" replaced a pretty bad, though graphic, nickname tribute to his huge hands - "The Claw".
Worst Sports Nickname - There was a Jewish baseball player who they tried to promote as the "Rabbi of Swat" way back in the 20's, but I think the worst sports nickname is the one they hung on future Hall of Famer Karl Malone. He probably spent his career wondering what he had done to the fans to deserve being known as "The Mailman." The explanation of the no-sense moniker was that "he always delivers". Sounds like something from a team's P.R. guy, which it no doubt was.

I looked over some election statistics and found something no one else in the world has discovered, which I now share with you. The presidential vote in Utah (McCain 63%, Obama 34%) is the exact mirror image of the vote in Humboldt County CA, with Obama at 63%, McCain 34%. Other than the possibility that people in these two places don't see things the same way, what could this mean? I'm working on that.

President Bush, you may have noticed, is using the last few weeks of his interminable second term to speak to mostly friendly audiences and TV correspondents making the case one more time for his decisions. You could call it a "Farewell Tour" or "Goodbye Tour", though no one could call it an "Apology Tour", because he doesn't do that. A name that might apply better would be the "It's Not My Fault Tour".
So whose fault is it? Two groups are set up to take the fall. The first is our intelligence operation guys, the spooks who supposedly got it wrong regarding Iraq's WMD's. Anyone who has spent any time with independent sources on this question knows that the spies came up with exactly what they were told to, though not in so many words. Bush took office looking for a reason to attack Iraq, though he left this detail out of the campaign, and, no surprise, found one, although it turned out to be coimpletly bogus.
Our upcoming depression also needs a fall guy, and that, indicates Mr. Bush, are the previous administrations that helped poorer people qualify for home loans. Of course, if a bad situation comes to you due to a previous policy flaw, it's then up to YOU to get the policy changed isn't it? Anyway, the current Bush plea is pretty far removed from Truman's "The Buck Stops Here".
Even Dick Cheney, he of the popularity rating under 20%, has something to say. Oh yeah, he DID have something to do with torturing a guy or two, but we got so much from those weasels that it was worth it, no question. OF COURSE it's worth it when no one will ask you the tough questions, hold you accountable, cut your pension, raise your taxes or cut the didvidends on war-connected stocks. I bet he can't wait to head out to his well-stocked, multi-million dollar fishing pond. Who needs Wyoming anynore when you've got the whole East Coast for fun and games?


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